Drawn Together with Anime and Video Games
by Linkinpark30101
Summary: formally known as big brother with anime and video games What happens when several fictional anime and game characters with nothing in common are chosen to live in one house together? Let's find out. Read and wonder why you read it in the first place.
1. Chapter 1

BIG BROTHER WITH ANIME AND VIDEO GAMES

(I don't own anyone)

Welcome, this is a story about several different anime/video game characters put together to live in one house together for 3 years as the people who arranged this sets little cameras all over their house and broadcasts their lives over the television live. So it's kinda like Drawn Together and Big Brother combined. I'm sorry if you don't like the arrangement I've made, who I put in, the jokes I pull on them, and any changes in their original personalities. If you don't want to see any of these characters with each other or being embarrassed in front of the others then don't read this, everyone will be made fun of. All of the characters where randomly selected by me and my brother.

List of chosen characters:

Cloud Strife:

Game: Final Fantasy VII

Age: 24

Occupation: Delivery Boy

Description: Cloud is the most serious member there in the house; he basically makes all of the money for the group.

Kadaj:

Movie: Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children

Age: looks 18

Occupation: none

Description: Kadaj is a very childish person; everyone is surprised they can trust him with a car or a sword without doing something wrong. He likes to call Cloud big brother.

Yazoo:

Movie: same as Kadaj

Age: looks 18

Occupation: none

Description: Yazoo is Kadaj's brother. He acts much more mature than Kadaj and older. Yazoo likes to keep his brothers together and not get in trouble.

Loz:

Movies: same as Yazoo

Age: looks 20

Occupation: none

Description: The third brother to Kadaj's brethren. Loz is the kind of guy that relays on brute strength, but he is also super fast.

Roxas:

Game: Kingdom Hearts II

Age: 15

Occupation: none

Description: Roxas is the neutral member of the family. He likes to stay out of problems and hangs around Kamille. Roxas is the 'peacemaker' who wants everyone to: "Shut the Fuck up!"

Sango:

Movie: Inuyasha

Age: 16

Occupation: Demon Slayer

Description: Sango is one of the youngest of the teenaged 'family members', but they allow her to drink and such. Sango doesn't like to hang around the 'freaks' and like the other 'normal' people.

Davis Motomiya:

Movie: Digimon 02

Age: 13

Occupation: Veemon's partner

Description: Davis is an obnoxious retard, as everyone calls him. For reasons being: he has the amazing ability to cheat death. You can have him fall down stairs, jump off a roof, get shot by a shot gun, and cut off his head and the bastard will still live! Everyone calls him Steve.

Veemon/Flamdramon/Raidramon/Magnamon/ExVeemon/Imperialdramon:

Movie: Digimon 02

Age: varies as he digivolves

Occupation: Davis's partner

Description: Veemon is a 2 foot nothing blue creature that everyone outside of the group mistakes for a dog. Veemon can digivolves any time he wants to take advantages of the age and structure of that form.

Kamille Bidan:

Movie: Zeta Gundam

Age: 17

Occupation: Ensign pilot of the Zeta Gundam for the AEUG military force

Description: Kamille is an angry kid that seems to take his anger out on anyone that pisses him off. In case no one knows, Kamille is a girl's name. Most of the people make fun of him because of his name and that pisses him off. But sometimes he can be a big help to everyone with his Zeta Gundam.

Solid Snake:

Game: Metal Gear Solid

Age: 34

Occupation: Agent

Description: Everyone calls him Snake. Snake is the man of the house and keeps all of the fuckers in line by treating them like they're in the Marines. To him everywhere is a battlefield and he keeps weapons with him at all times. He treats Kamille like an officer in the military still.

Samus Aran:

Game: Metroid Prime

Age: 22

Occupation: Bounty Hunter

Description: Samus is one of the only few people with a real job. She is very serious and doesn't like to play games and jokes. She tends to ignore everyone and does her job, but not on weekends.

Dante:

Game: Devil May Cry 1, 2, and 3

Age: looks 24

Occupation: none

Description: Dante is the cook of the house hold. He makes dinners, lunches, and breakfasts with Flamdramon everyday. He, like Davis, cannot die and like to play jokes on people with Kamille. Dante use to have a job, but he got fired after killing off some of the employees.

Yuffie Katsuragi:

Movie: Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children

Age: 18

Occupation: Ninja

Description: Yuffie is one of the only few members that try to resolve the conflict between the 'family' members. Yuffie sometimes acts like she's having a sugar rush and ADD at the same time. She seems to always be in the right place at the right time.

Alia:

Game: Mega Man X8

Age: looks in her early 20's

Occupation: Maverick Hunter Navigator

Description: Alia is the only robot in the whole 'family' and one of the smartest due to her high IQ (300). She seems to not like most of the members because she finds them to be crazy and barbaric. Sadly for her, she seems to be the butt of most jokes Kamille pulls on the members, but she gets to him when she calls him kid.

Tails:

TV show: Sonic X

Age: 8

Occupation: none

Description: Tails is one of the youngest members of the 'family'. He is the smartest member with an IQ of 400 (A/N: wait, is that possible?). Tails hangs around with Alia a lot and befriends Veemon through their time together in the house.

Shadow the Hedgehog:

TV Show: Sonic X

Age: 16

Occupation: none

Description: Shadow is rude, violent, and stoic. When he makes threats, he has every intention of carrying it out, sometime it back fires on him. Shadow owns a gun in which he likes to destroy things with it. He wants to be better than everyone in the 'family' but they use the opportunity to play a joke on him.

MSZ-006 Zeta Gundam:

Movie: Zeta Gundam

Age: none

Occupation: AEUG mobile suit

Description: The Zeta Gundam is Kamille's main source of transportation and weapon of choice. The Zeta is often used to help with work around the house other than fight of Titan mobile suits. When the Zeta Gundam is not in use it's taking up space in the driveway, but comes in pretty handy when going up against the Power Rangers.


	2. Day One: First Day in the House

DAY ONE: FIRST DAY IN THE HOUSE

(I don't own anyone)

Cloud was able to get up that day even after drinking a lot of booze. The hang over kept him from standing up straight and from standing at all until he put an ice pack over his head. He headed down stairs where he jumped onto the couch to find Kadaj watching the Grudge.

"G'morning, big brother." said Kadaj.

"Easy for you to say…" he said.

"Aww, you didn't have that many drinks." he said, then he thought about it. "Oh wait, maybe you did..."

"What are you watching?" asked Cloud leaning his head on the arm rest.

"The Grudge." he said. "It's Yazoo's favorite."

"Where is Yazoo?" he asked.

"He's with Loz getting everyone up and out of bed." he said.

As Kadaj and Cloud spoke, Loz and Yazoo were walking up and down the halls banging an aluminum bat around inside a metal garbage can. "RAISE AND SHINE!"

"Time to get up!" yelled Yazoo. "Dante's almost done with breakfast!"

Kamille did his best to block out the noise, but when he couldn't take much more of it; he stuck his head out and threw a shoe at Yazoo's head. "Shut up!"

Yazoo took the shoe to the head and turned around to see Kamille before he closed his door. "I saw that punk!"

"Relax." said Loz continuing his noisy wake up call. "GET UP, PEOPLES!"

Everyone managed to get up and out of bed to get the nessesary hygiene procedures done before breakfast. Dante and Veemon/Flamdramon where always up early to make breakfast for everyone.

Everyone came in one by one to the dining room usually in their clothes or bath robes. "Do we ever get a day to sleep in?" asked Sango.

"Not while we're here I'm guessing." said Roxas rubbing his eye.

Dante was in the kitchen with Flamdramon making food. "Are you sure we made enough pancakes?" asked Flamdramon.

"Yes, depending on the stomach capacity of all of the family members." said Dante. "This is just the right amount."

"Okay…" he said looking at the stacks. "How many did we make?"

"36." Dante said.

"Yeah, that sounds like enough." he said.

They both came in at the same time with fresh pancakes. "Breakfast is served fools!"

Everyone look at the stack in amazement. Then Davis started looking around. "…12…13…14...hey, we're short two people."

Yuffie started counting everyone on her fingers. "He's right."

"Where the old guy…Snake, was it?" asked Dante.

"Yeah and…." Tails was cut off by the sound of something crawling through the air vents.

"We have rats?" asked Kamille trying to trace the sound as it travels through the ceiling.

"Sounds more like a capybara." said Yazoo looking up.

Then one of the air vents fell off the ceiling and Snake jumped out. "I am here!"

"You travel through air vents?" asked Dante.

"In my line of work, you have to be like the wind." He said taking a seat. "Silent and unnoticeable."

"Good luck with that." said Cloud.

"Oh, no wonder I wasn't getting any air conditioning." said Samus. "There's an old guy blocking it."

"Old?" Snake asked.

"But we're short one person still." said Davis.

"Did you forget to count yourself?" asked Alia.

"Huh?" Davis counted over again. "…13…14…15…16…yeah…"

"Steve, you're hopeless." said Kamille.

"Why do you call him Steve?" asked Yuffie.

"That's his nickname." said Kadaj.

"Since when was Steve a nickname?" asked Samus.

"It ain't." said Snake eating his pancake off his boot knife.

"I actually like my nickname, its funny." said Davis.

Roxas raises an eyebrow. "I need better friends…"

"Actually Steve is a common first name usually used for Americans of white skin color." said Alia.

"Smart ass." said Kadaj.

"Well, we couldn't call him Tyrone." said Kamille. "It would be like…"

"Calling you Latoya?" asked Alia.

Kamille glared at her. "Sonova Bitch!" he said grabbing a salt shaker and throwing some into her eyes after taking the top off.

Alia just blinked a few times and move them around to get some of the salt out. "That didn't hurt."

Kamille grabbed Snakes knife and sliced her across the face with it. "Hey, my knife, punk!" said Snake.

"Aaaaaah! My eye!" she yelled falling out of her chair covering her right eye.

"That's for making fun of me having a girl's name!" he said before he looked down to see her eye rolling across the table. "…oops…"

"Eeeeew!" yelled Yuffie. "Eye on the table!"

"Holy Hell!" yelling Davis wacking it away from him into Yazoo's pancakes.

"Gaaaaaah!" yelled Yazoo throwing his plate across the room and hitting Cloud in the face.

"I can't see!" yelled Cloud getting out of his chair and felling around in front of him. Not knowingly, he grabbed Samus's breasts in all of the commotion.

"You pervert, Cloud!" she yelled grabbing his shirt collar and punching him in the face.

"My knife, punk!" yelled Snake grabbing Kamille's shirt and punching him in the jaw. The punch caused Kamille to lose his grip and throw the knife into Shadow's chest.

"Gak!" yelled Shadow before he fell over.

Kamille fell on Veemon when he lost balance. "Hey, you Sonova pig!" he yelled before digivolving into Imperialdramon. "Supreme Positron Laser!" he yelled blasting it a Kamille, but he ducked from it and he blasted Davis, who exploded into several charred body parts.

"Ha!" said Kamille. "Missed me!" His smart mouth earned him a punch from ExVeemon and he was rewarded with a kick to the groin by Kamille.

Sango grabbed Davis's head as it flew to her. "Aaaaaah! Steve's head!" she yelled as she threw it unknowing that it would hit Samus in the back of hers.

Samus turned after feeling the hit of Davis's head and hers. "You bitch!" she yelled as she jumped onto Sango and started kicking and pulling on her clothes.

Everyone except Dante, Tails, and Roxas were in a large conflict in the dining room. "Man…this sucks…" said Roxas.

"I make them breakfast and this is how they repay me?" said Dante.

Tails looks down and found Alia's eye rolling to his foot. "Oh, here it is." he said after seeing Alia crawling around for it.

"What's that?" asked Roxas.

"The cause of this crazy brawl." said Tails showing it to Roxas. "It's Alia's eye."

Roxas widened his eyes at the sight of it. "…"

"Well, first days are always the worst." said Dante.

That Afternoon…

Alia just got finished wrapping a bandage over her right eye after placing it back in place, plus everyone was now in bandages, casts, chairs, and ice packs. Davis and Shadow amazingly lived.

"Well everyone, we have just experienced our first morning together." said Dante. "And we can safely say it sucked ass."

"Yeah…" said everyone.

"Let's don't try to kill each other the rest of the three years." he said. "We're family."

"I guess we can call that a family feud, then?" asked Shadow.

"We really need to start getting along." said Samus as she signed Yazoo's cast.

"I hate all of you." said Kamille.

"No one cares anymore!" they all said.

"Alright, it's time we started to treat each other like family and less killing each other." said Roxas.

"Awww, but I want to screw Sango." said Davis who doesn't have a scratch on him, even after exploding.

"I never said treat each other like we where blood related." said Dante. "I don't really care who you fuck or kill, just don't do a lot of killing."

"Why?" asked Shadow. "As long as we're with each other we can't die."

"Do you think we want the people who are watching this to get a bad impression of us?" asked Tails. "I mean, Steve just exploded, which might have already given us an R rating."

"And Cloud groped Samus." said Loz drawing pictures on his brother's cast.

"Let's just keep the adult content to a minimal." said Alia.

"I'm okay with that." said Yuffie.

"Can I still carry a gun?" asked Snake.

"Sure." said Roxas.

"Alright, it's settled." said Tails.

Everyone agreed to not try to kill each other so much for now on, but that never stopped any of them from pulling mean jokes on each other or hating one another's guts. People like Shadow or Kamille start up bad relation ships very fast, and boy do things happen fast when all of these characters live under one roof.

After quickly recovering from his injuries, Snake continued to fix up his room to his liking. He started painting the walls to look like camouflage and he put up a hammock after throwing his bed out the window on top of Shadow. Roxas had his room painted black and white with matching furniture and items that made him feel at home. Samus threw out most of the furniture that she didn't need and put up a bunch of electronic equipment so that she can work at home.

Veemon and Tails began to build a friendship as they began to play Super Smash Brothers with each other. Tails, for some reason, can't beat Veemon.

"So Kadaj, do you think this arrangement will go well?" asked Cloud.

"Probably not." said Kadaj hitting the 13 ball on the poll table into a corner pocket. "After the damage we did this morning, we probably won't last a year."

"Awww." said Yuffie. "Can't you be a little more positive?"

"Look, Alia lost an eye, Steve exploded, and Shadow took a knife to his heart." said Cloud. "Kadaj might be right."

"I'll be back." said Kadaj as he left the room. "Gotta' get some grub." He left the game room and headed down the halls before he met up with Davis. "Hey, Steve."

"Sup, Kadaj?" he said walking past him to his room.

Kadaj came to the kitchen and found Alia going through the cabinets. "Ummm, what are you doing?" he asked.

She turned around. "Oh, I'm alphabetizing." she said.

"Alpha-what?" said Kadaj. "Don't use big words around me."

"It's not a big word." she said. "Anyways, it means to put two or more objects in a chronological order depending on the beginning letter of that object's position in the alphabet."

Kadaj stood there clueless. "…ummm…does that explanation come in English?"

"I was speaking English." she said.

"Then talk slower." he said. "You use so many complex sentences I didn't understand you at all."

She sighed and walked up to him. "Kadaj, can I ask you something?"

"Ummm…yeah…" he said.

"It may sound offensive…" she said crossing her arms. "…Kadaj, are you really that stupid?"

"Sometimes…" he said. Then he noticed Davis sitting next to an open oven with sunglasses and swim trunks. "How long have you been there?"

"Not very long." said Davis.

"Davis…" started Alia.

"Steve." said Kadaj.

"…Davis, what are you doing?" she asked.

"Getting a tan." he said. "It works."

"That's using up the fuel in the oven, don't do that!" she said.

"Why?" he asked. "I want to get a tan."

"Then go outside." said Kadaj. "It's a wonderful sunny day out."

"So?" said Davis taking off his glasses to show the difference in skin color. "It's only 62 degrees out and home appliances work great." Then the oven turned off and Alia stood over him with the plug. "Hey, put the plug back in!"

"I'm surrounded by idiots." said Alia before a knife flew past her face.

"I resent that!" yelled Snake from the kitchen door.

"Sorry, sir." she said grabbing Davis. "Get out of here kid, I'd hate to see what you do with other machines."

"Fine, I wanted to leave anyways!" he said walking out of the room.

"What's wrong with what he's doing?" asked Kadaj. "If the oven breaks, then just replace it."

"Machines have feelings too!" she said closing the oven.

"No they don't." said Kadaj, "Or my bike would be complaining about the rocky terrain I always drive on."

"They do have feelings." she said. "I know this my self." She said before opening another cabinet. Once she did green slim started spilling out of it and all over her body. Kadaj tried to hold his laughter in but he couldn't stop the tears. "This isn't funny…"

"Oh yes, it is!" said Kamille jumping out of the pantry holding his gut as he laughed his head off. "Kadaj and I planed this from the start!"

"What!" she said looking up and down her slim covered armor. "I hate your guts, Kamille!"

"I hate yours too!" he said running out of the kitchen. "Sucker!"

She ignored Kamille and looked at Kadaj who was still laughing. "Leave…"

"Why should I?" he said before she punched a gapping hole in the wall. "I'm going to leave anyways…to take a piss."

Later that night. Everyone gathered around for their first dinner by Dante. They each all hoped that they don't kill each other after they eat, but most of the boys hoped that Sango and Samus get into another cat fight. Davis got a tan after all and Alia came to the table wearing purple armor.

"Dinner is served!" said Dante walking out with a large cart filled with different trays of food. "And I broke my back in making it, so if it tastes bad, don't tell me!"

Everyone began eating what he made and continued already begun conversations. Snake once again ate with his trusty boot knife while others ate with forks, spoons, steak knives, and chop sticks.

"Hey Dante, this is good." said Tails.

"Yeah, it's better than the steak at those fancy restaurants." said Samus.

"Good shit, Dante." said Snake stabbing into it.

"Not bad." said Kadaj.

"Thanks everyone." said Dante. "It was a pain hunting for it."

"This wasn't bought?" asked Samus.

"Nope, I had to search into the deep depths of the demon realm to find it." said Dante. "They're never store bought."

"So this is a demon?" asked Yuffie.

"Not bad." said Sango.

"Really? It's one of those fat worm demons that feed of your excrement after it's dumped out into the sewage yards in the wastelands." said Dante. "Juicy isn't it?"

Loz vomits whatever was in his mouth onto the ground. Tails starts brushing his tongue with a large brush. Sango starts drinking a gallon container of water. Snake continues to eat it with some of it sticking out of his mouth. Veemon starts sticking his finger in the back of his mouth to vomit his food up.

"Better than my mom's cooking." said Kamille putting more of it into his mouth.

Alia ran into the bathroom to vomit. Cloud started to brush his teeth with his tooth brush. Shadow's eyes rolled back into his head and he fainted.

"I ain't gonna die, so I don't care." said Davis eating his plate of it as Kamille took the rest off Yazoo's plate.

"At least you fuckers didn't say my food sucked." said Dante.

END DAY ONE…

COMING UP NEXT: DAY TWO: A TRIP TO THE BEACH


	3. Day Two: A Trip to the Beach

DAY TWO: A TRIP TO THE BEACH

(I Don't own anyone)

Everyone got up on their own accord this time instead of Yazoo and Loz going up and down the halls with a trash can and an aluminum bat. Instead of having Dante make breakfast, they just ate what ever they could find in the kitchen cabinets. "Well, better than giant worms." said Tails.

"I think I might think twice about Dante's cooking." said Sango.

"It wasn't that bad." said Kamille reading the newspaper. "Hey guys, the President of Cornaria, General Pepper, is dead."

"What?" said Yuffie.

"He kicked the bucket?" asked Veemon.

"Yeah, it says that a camera in his room caught a tall man with a long sword coming down and stabbing him through his back when he was praying next to his bed." said Kamille looking through the article. "Good riddance I say."

"Where's Cornaria?" asked Kadaj.

"Who knows." said Cloud.

"This is boring." said Samus. "The most boring Saturday I've ever had."

"It's just the morning." said Davis. "What do you expect?"

"Where I come from, I usually fly off to a distant planet to kill something." said Samus.

Kadaj looked through a magazine and looked at the pictures for ideas to end Samus's boredom. "Umm, we can go to Disney Land."

"We're in California!" said Yuffie. "Disney Land is in Florida."

"Oh, well…we can go to the beach…" he said looking at one of the pictures.

"The beach?" asked Veemon.

"Yeah, there's one that's about four miles from here." said Sango.

"What do you say Samus?" asked Cloud.

Samus thought about it for a second. "Well…I guess…"

"Or we can stay here and watch TV all day." said Davis.

"I guess." said Samus. "Let's hope this will be a normal visit."

"Relax." said Yazoo. "What kind of crazy things could happen to us other than the crap we do to each other here?"

It was agreed by all of the house members that they would go to the beach. But some of them believed if they get killed outside the house they won't come back. So they decided to minimize the amount of deaths to only Davis. Getting dressed for the beach was the hard part for the girls since they thought Snake was going through the air vents still, but everyone was ready in the end in one hour. As for transportation, Kadaj, his brothers, and Cloud still had their bikes, but everyone decided to take the three H2 Hummers in the garage and the Zeta Gundam that was sitting in the driveway taking up space.

"Are we there yet?" asked Davis to Kadaj, who was driving.

"No, Steve." He answered.

"Are we there yet?" asked Veemon.

"No, Veemon." answered Alia sitting in the passenger seat in the front.

"I need to pee." said Tails.

"Grab a bottle on the floor." said Kadaj. "I think there are a few still there from the party we had."

"Eeeeew." said Alia. "Don't have Tails do that, it's disgusting!"

"But I gotta go!" said Tails holding himself.

"Then hold it, we're almost there." said Alia.

"Easy for you to say." said Davis. "I'll bet you can't pee."

"Shut up, Davis!" yelled Alia. "My body's functions are none of your business!"

"Oh look, we're here." said Kadaj parking next to the beach. "And the crapper's just over there."

"Thank God!" said Tails jumping out the door and flying over to the restroom.

Kadaj jumped out and met up with his brothers and Cloud. "Looks like we aren't the only one's here."

"Yeah, it's about 94 degrees out so I'd imagine it'd be great for other families to come out here." said Kamille walking over to them with a surf board, a few bags, and an umbrella.

"Hey kid, where did you find a parking space for your Gundam?" asked Loz.

"Ummm, well if I parked in the parking lot, people coming here would complain about how it would take up six parking spaces." started Kamille as he dropped his bags. "So I parked it over there in the sand."

"Now people are going to be complaining about how it takes up six parking spaces worth of sand." said Cloud.

Tails finally got out of the restroom and joined Shadow and Veemon in setting up Roxas's umbrella. Almost everyone had an umbrella that represented them. Roxas had a black and white one, Samus had a red one, Snake had a camouflage one, Dante had an umbrella with flames on it, and Cloud had a black one that said Final Fantasy VII on it. Snake's spot on the beach was different from everyone else's; his looked like a dugout with barb wire over the tops of a sand wall and a sniper rifle sticking out on one side. "You can never be to careful." He always said to anyone that questioned. Everyone even wore a swim suit that represents them. Half of the girls wore bikinis while the others wore full one-piece swim suits.

Roxas and Kamille decided to set up the volley ball net and bring out the valley ball to play a few games. Samus, Alia, Dante, and Cloud seemed to have unusually strong hits in the games. Most of the hits made by the opposing team hit Davis in the face, but he didn't seem to mind. "Steve, your head's in the way, move it!" Kadaj would always say.

Everything seemed fine with our heroes, but even the most unexpected things happen every where they go. And I mean they aren't always in a car accident, I mean that trouble always finds them; I know this because I'm the author of this damned story, duh!

Cloud was enjoying his time talking to Samus as the others have fun and Shadow competes against Kamille to see who the better surfer was until Kadaj came to him. "Hello, big brother." he said.

"Huh, what do you need?" asked Cloud after being interrupted by him.

"Look over there!" said Kadaj pointing in one direction.

Cloud and Samus looked in the direction he pointed in and saw the biggest sand castle they've ever laid eyes on. "Oh my god…" said Samus.

"Kadaj, what the hell is that?!" said Cloud amazed at the giant sand castle.

"Surprised?" he said. "Our brothers and I built it together with Steve. We can probably fit the Zeta Gundam in there."

"Why did you spend so much time and energy creating such a large structure like that if the weather is just going to break it down some day?!" asked Samus.

"Relax." said Kadaj. "We're going to have Flamdramon heat it up so it would be a large piece of glass."

"Good luck with that…" said Cloud before Kadaj walked away.

Kadaj walked back over to the castle to meet up with his brothers. "How's it going?"

"Pretty well." said Loz. "We're almost ready to start the second floor!"

"Sweet." said Kadaj.

"Yep, ummm…hey, who are they?" asked Yazoo spotting a group of teenagers walking over to the castle.

Kadaj spun around and saw them walking up to them as well. There where two girls and three boys walking up to the castle. "Who are they?"

"This is perfect for our new command center, rangers!" said the one that seemed like the leader.

"You like it?" asked Kadaj. "We made it."

"Yes, we will be using this castle as our new command center since our last one was destroyed!" said one of the boys.

"Why would you use a castle made of sand as a command center when it has no running water, no electricity, no good living conditions, and every reason why the Mexicans left Mexico in the first place?" asked Loz.

"We'll manage." said the leader. "Now hand it over to us, or we'll take it by force!"

Kadaj shrugged. "…actually, I'd be glad to hand it over to yo-"

"IT'S MORPHING TIME!"

"Did he say morphine?" asked Loz.

(A/N: insert Mighty Morphing Power Ranger theme song here)

"Aww, crap." said Yazoo walking off. "I'm getting us some snow cones."

The rangers started morphing slowly one at a time. By the time one of them was done, Yazoo had just purchased three snow cones and handed them to his brothers. One by one the rangers finished morphing, and once they where done, Kadaj and his brothers had gotten back to the beach fully dressed and armed with their weapons. "Wow, you guys take a long time to do that." said Kadaj.

"Let's go, rangers!" said the Red Ranger. All of the rangers started running towards Kadaj and his brothers. They were quick to react to the oncoming Power Ranger onslaught. Loz clothes-lined the Black Ranger and kicked the Blue Ranger in the crotch. Yazoo took on both the Pink Ranger and the Yellow Ranger with just his Gunblade. He grabbed both of them and banged their heads together. Sparks literally flew as the battle raged on. Kadaj took on the lone Red Ranger. "Give it up, we out number you five to three."

"You under estimate me too much." said Kadaj as the Red Ranger throws a punch at him. Kadaj dodged it with ease and sliced the Red Ranger seven times creating a storm of sparks. "Where are the sparks coming from?"

All of the rangers regroup around the Red Ranger. "They're too good!"

"Are you going to leave us alone now?" asked Yazoo.

"We won't lose to the likes of you!!" said the Red Ranger. "Quick Rangers, to the Zords!!"

"Zords?" asked Kadaj as the Power Rangers ran away. "I guess that means run home."

After a few minutes, the Power Rangers came back with a bunch of large robots. "What the hell?" said Loz.

"Those are Zords?" asked Yazoo.

"Now we will crush you!" said the Red Ranger. "Now Rangers, combine!" Then all of the Zords start combining into a large robot. It looked very weird since it was a bunch of animals coming together "Ha, let's see you win now!!"

"Looks like Voltron." said Yazoo. The Zord pulled out a really big sword and slashed down at Kadaj and the others. "Incoming!" yelled Yazoo and they all jumped to one side.

When the sword lifted up, the top part of Davis's torso crawled out of the large crack in the ground. "Hey! Ass holes!!"

"This looks like a job for Kamille!" said Kadaj as he ran after him. Kamille was lying on his beach towel trying to tan his body. Kadaj grabbed him and brought him to his feet. "Kamille, we need your help!"

"What the heck do you need me for?" asked Kamille. Kadaj pointed behind him. Kamille turned around and jumped back after seeing the Zord. "What is that?!"

"That's what we want you to take out!" said Loz.

"I'll go get Zeta…" said Kamille running to his mobile suit. Kamille got to it and started it up. "Can't everyone just leave me out of their own problems?"

"Hey Red Ranger, there's the Zeta Gundam to our right!" said the Yellow Ranger.

"Oh no, I ain't falling for that one!" he said, but he turned to look anyways and saw Zeta rise up from the sand. "Oh, crap."

"Time for you guys to pick on some one your own size!" said Kamille as the Zeta Gundam approached the Zord.

"Quick Rangers, cut him to pieces!" said the Red Ranger. The Zord swung its sword at the Zeta Gundam and it shattered once it came in contact with the Zeta. "What the heck?"

"The Power Sword has been destroyed!" said the Pink Ranger. "The Zeta Gundam's armor is too thick!"

"Fine, we'll have to do this the old fashion way!" said the Red Ranger as the zord sprang into action. Its first attack was a punch to the Zeta's face, but it grabbed the fist and gave the zord a punch to the face instead. The zord stumbled back wards a bit and made a successful kick to the Zeta's side.

"Not bad!" said Kamille. The Zeta was strong enough to keep balance and it made a perfect round-house kick to the zord's head, then a palm strike to the chest making the zord fall over. "Had enough?"

"White Ranger!" said the Red Ranger. "We need your help!"

All of the sudden, a giant white tiger zord was running up to Kamille from behind. "What the hell?"

"Help's on the way!" said the White Ranger.

"I'm surrounded by idiots!" said Kamille. Just after he said that, the tiger transformed into a humanoid figure. "And I thought Zakus looked bad."

"I'm going to blow him away!" said the White Ranger. Both of the zords surrounded the Zeta front and back. The Tiger Zord attacked first by turning the Zeta to face it and punching it in the face. Then the other one kicked the Zeta. After the Zeta got steady again, the White Tiger Zord grabbed the Zeta's arms. "Get him now!"

The Ranger's zord started punching away at the Zeta as best as it could. "Kamille's in trouble!" said Yuffie.

"Not if I can help it!" said Snake as he started firing the sniper rifle he had with him at the zord's head. "Die! Die! Die!"

The Zeta Gundam was able to kick the zord in front of him and it boosted up into the air with the White Tiger Zord still hanging on to it, but it fell off after a while of flying. Kamille took the Beam Rifle and aimed it at the center of the zord and fired. The shot made it exploded into many pieces. "The White Ranger's dead!" said the Black Ranger.

"Now it's my turn." said Kamille aiming the Gundam's Beam Rifle at the head. He locked onto the center of it and fired. The shot blasted right through the center of the eyes and out the back of the head.

"Whoa!" yelled the Blue Ranger as sparks flew from the controls and the beam just barely missed him. "That was close, Red Ranger…Red Ranger?" The Rangers looked to the Red Ranger. He was still holding the controls, but the top section of his torso was cut away in a U shape along with his head.

"That's…that's not good…" said the Black Ranger.

Just then, the White Ranger entered the control room through the door. "The Red Ranger kicked the bucket! Which means I'm in command now!" he said going over to the main controls and grabbing his corps. "'scuse me, good buddy." said the White Ranger before he threw his charred corps out the hole in the window. "Now, let's take out the Zeta Gundam!!"

"We can't." said the Yellow Ranger. "In those exact 45 seconds that you used to take command, he cut off both of our zord's arms."

"Oh, then…Fire the Ultimate Weapon!" he commanded.

"What!?" said the Pink Ranger. "That's a weapon of last resort!"

"I don't care!" said the White Ranger. "Charge it!" The rangers did as told and started up the weapon. The zord started glowing an intense red color.

Kamille put on his sunglasses when it got too bright. "I can actually get my tan from this." He said leaning back in his seat.

All of Kamille's house mates start watching the zord power up. "What the heck?" said Sango. "What is that?"

"I have no idea…" said Dante.

"What is the power level in the weapon?!" asked the White Ranger.

"Umm…2 out of 100." said the Black Ranger.

"What?!" said the White Ranger. "Charge a little more."

Everyone stopped what they where doing and watched the zord charge. "This is weird…I thought this would be normal…" said Samus.

"What's our energy level now?!" said the White Ranger.

"5 out of 100." said the Black Ranger.

"Good enough, Fire!!"

The zord concentrated all of the power into one section in the center of the torso and an incredibly large blast that looked like Libra's main cannon came from it hitting the Zeta Gundam right on. "Kamille!!" yelled all of his house mates. After the blast was done, the place where the Zeta Gundam was standing was now engulfed in smoke.

"Soldier down." said Snake.

Alia began to cry. "Why did he have to die…?" she said crying. "He was just a kid…"

"I thought you hated his guts." said Kadaj.

"But he was just a kid, and he's…" she was cut off there.

"Boy, that was bright!" someone said from what sounded like a speaker.

"Hey, that sounds like Kamille." said Cloud.

The smoke cleared and the Zeta Gundam was revealed laying on the ground, but without a scratch. "I think I got a tan from that!"

"Kamille's alive!" said Veemon, then he turned to Alia. "And you where all worried about him."

"N-no…I just had something in my eye." she said turning away and crossing her arms.

The Zeta Gundam wasn't even damaged, but the area around it was completely destroyed. "Oh my god, what have we done?!" said the Yellow Ranger.

"That was 5 percent?!" said the Black Ranger. "That was huge!"

"We're no better than the evil that we fight!" said the Blue Ranger. Then he turns to the White Ranger. "What do we do?"

"…………CHARGE UP ANOTHER SHOT!!" he yelled.

"Are you crazy?!" said the Black Ranger.

"Screw this, I'm getting out of here!" said the Blue Ranger as he jumped out the hole in the window. Amazingly he survived the fall. "So long, suckers!" he shouted as he ran into the road and got hit by a semi truck.

"Divert all power to the Ultimate Weapon, we'll completely wipe him out this time!!!" he said. "How much power do we have left in the Zord?!"

"45." said the Black Ranger. "We don't even have enough power to charge up another shot."

"I don't care just do it!!!" said the White Ranger. "We'll blow that fucker away with one shot!"

The rangers started diverting all of the power to the main weapon and the zord began to glow the darkest crimson ever seen. "That doesn't look good." said Kamille.

All of his house mates drop their jaws. "Oh…crap…" said Yazoo.

"Cool…" said Veemon and Roxas as the chest of the zord opened up to reveal a big ass cannon.

"All power has been diverted to the main weapon!" said the Yellow Ranger.

The white ranger slammed his hand on the controls in front of him to smash a glass covered button that read: Warning! Do not Press! "This is it for you, Zeta Gundam!" said the White Ranger. "The Mighty Morphing Power Rangers never lose!"

Kamille just stood there and studied the large cannon in amazement. "Awesome…"

"SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND!!!" yelled the White Ranger as he slammed his hand down on the button.

Kamille covered his eyes. "I don't want to watch!"

But instead of a shot that looked like an atomic bomb, the whole zord stopped moving and all of the glowing colors faded away. Inside of the control room of the zord, all of the buttons and flashing lights turned off and everything became quiet. "What the hell?!" said the White Ranger.

"We diverted all of the power into the main weapon but we don't have enough power to fire it now!" said the Black Ranger. "In fact we don't have any power at all!"

"Shit!" yelled the White Ranger. "What do we do know?!"

"Ummm, Zeta Gundam…closing in…" said the Pink Ranger.

The Zeta slowly walked up to the zord and looking into the eyes where the rangers where. "You guys suck." said Kamille. The Zeta put its hand on the zord's chest and pushed on it causing the whole zord to fall backwards. Once it fell onto the ground it missed everyone except the upper section of Davis. "Can we go home now?" asked Kamille.

"Ummm…yeah…" said Samus. "I'm not bored any more…"

NEXT: DAY THREE: TRUTH OR DARE


	4. Day Three: Truth or Dare

DAY THREE: TRUTH OR DARE

(…still don't own anyone…)

It appeared that the family of crazy, psychotic, stupid, sadistic, or retarded people has started to get use to each other's personality. But just because they get use to that doesn't mean that they get along with everyone. Actually, they seem to be getting along pretty well, most of them anyways.

"Hey, Roxas!" yelled Dante throughout the house. "Come outside, we're going to play soccer!"

Roxas walked down the stairs and looked at the teams with his tired eyes. Team one was: Kamille, Kadaj, Davis, and Dante. Team two consisted of: Shadow, Yazoo, Loz, Tails, and Yuffie. "It's 5:30 in the morning…"

"Yeah, isn't it great?" said Kadaj. "You're on our team."

"I'm the referee." said Snake pumping a sand bag rifle.

"…all right…" said Roxas, "Let me get my shoes…"

Out on the field, Snake got a lawn chair and sat on the side of the field as Kadaj and Shadow get ready for the beginning kick. If you where standing against the wall of the house and facing the backyard, Kadaj's team was on the right and Shadow's team was on the left. "You're going down, little man." said Kadaj.

"After you, queer." said Shadow. "You can't beat me; I'm the ultimate life form!"

"That's great, man." said Kadaj.

Snake got up from his chair and walked over to the center with the ball. "Now, I want to see a good game." he said. "And if I see any rules broken, I have my gun over there."

"Now let's play ball, maggots!" he said throwing the ball in the air.

Kadaj was the first to get to it since he was taller than Shadow and hit it off his head. "Curse my height!" said Shadow.

Kadaj was running down the field with the ball with Dante trailing behind him. Yazoo, who was quicker than Kadaj, got the ball and headed to his goal which was guarded by Roxas. "Too fast for ya, brother!"

But Dante went down there as well to retrieve the ball. Yazoo kept good control over it until he came to Davis. "Move, Steve!"

"Nope." said Davis. "Dante said stand here and make sure the ball is in front of you."

"Okay." said Yazoo going around Davis, waiting for him was Kamille. Before Yazoo could react, Kamille took control of the ball and kicked it over to the other side of the field. "Hey!"

Yuffie looked up and saw the ball heading to her face. "Oh, crap!" she said. Her first reaction was to close her eyes and hold her hands out in front of her. Her hands hit the ball away, but once she did, a sand bag hit her right forearm. "Owwww!!!"

"No hands!!" said Snake pumping his rifle again.

Dante took control of the ball now. "Check this out!" he said kicking the high into the air. Then he jumped up, did a perfect back flip, and kicked the ball in the direction of the goal.

"He's going to score!" said Davis.

"It's going into the neighbor's yard!" said Kamille.

Roxas's eyes followed the ball "And it's going into that…"

Crash!

"…window."

Dante landed. "Aww man."

"Way to go, dick head." said Loz. "If we're sued, you're paying it."

"Relax." said Dante. "That house has been vacant ever since we got here, no one lives there." To his surprise, a woman with purple hair and red eyes walked over to the window from inside the house with the ball in one hand and the other rubbing the back of her head. "I stand corrected."

"First week in America, and I need to replace the window…" said the woman.

"You're paying." repeated Loz to Dante.

The woman looked at the soccer players and looked at the ball. "Is this your ball?"

"Umm, yes." said Kadaj. "And, umm, welcome to Elm Street, the best street in all of San Francisco!"

"Gee, thanks." she said. "So, which one of you asses broke my window?" Everyone looks to Dante. "Worst kick I've ever seen if you where trying to make it into the goal."

"Actually, it was pretty cool." said Davis.

"Shut up, Steve." said Dante.

"Hey, who are you?" asked Kamille.

"You can call me Miss Kusanagi." she said.

"What's your first name?" asked Davis.

"Just call me Miss Kusanagi for now." she answered. She tossed the ball up and spiked it to them. It hit Tails and he flew back a few yards. Then she left the window.

"Strong woman." said Roxas.

"Fine as hell, too." said Dante. "Did you see her boobs?" Just then, a crack of thunder was heard. Everyone looked to the sky. "Okay game over, my team won." He ran to the house.

"Hey!" said Yazoo following him. "You missed the goal!"

Everyone headed to the house. Kamille stopped to see Davis walking over to the ball to pick it up. "Hurry up, Steve!" he called.

Davis turned to him and smiled. "Relax, what's the worst that could happen?" After his picks up the ball bolts of lightning came down and struck him three times.

"Holy hell!!" said Loz.

Davis, now looking like a burnt hamburger, started stumbling around. "Don't worry, I'm fine…" he said.

After a while, everyone gathered in the living room to sit down and discuss what to do next. "Well…" started Samus. "I can always go to my room and pay the bills."

"Those aren't due until next month." said Dante as he jumped onto the couch.

"I have some cards, we can play poker." said Cloud.

"Yeah, let's invite the lady next door so we can play strip poker!" said Kadaj.

"Naw." said Flamdramon gulping down a bottle of beer. "Half of us don't even know how to play." He placed the bottle on the table and it fell over and started turning in place. Everyone stared at the spinning bottle before it stopped and pointed to Sango. "What's so important about an empty beer bottle?"

"…are you thinking what I'm thinking…?" asked Dante.

"He should have put that in the recycling?" asked Alia.

"No, you walking trash can!" said Kamille. "He means we can play a game with the bottle!"

"Let's play Truth or Dare!" said Davis.

"Looks like someone was thinking the same thing." said Dante.

"Me first!" said Flamdramon. "It's my bottle!" He grabbed the bottle and spun it. The bottle spun for a while before it landed on Yuffie. "Truth or dare?"

"Ummm, truth." she said.

"Pussy." said Loz.

"Is it true that you're a virgin?" asked Flamdramon.

"Yeah, so?" said Yuffie.

"Sad." said Yazoo. "And you're 18."

"So?" said Yuffie. "How old are you?"

"Two in reality." he said. "Who cares if I'm a virgin?"

"Whatever!" said Yuffie spinning the bottle. The bottle spun for 5 seconds and landed on Kamille. "Kamille, truth or dare?"

"Dare me." He said yawning and leaning back.

"I dare you to hug Roxas."

Kamille stood silent for a second. "Just because I have a girl's name doesn't mean I'm gay."

"It's a dare, buddy." said Dante.

Roxas looked at Kamille. "...well… it could be worse…" Kamille leaned over slightly and hugged him.

"Good boy." said Yuffie.

"My turn." said Kamille. He spun the bottle. It spun for 6 seconds and landed on Samus. "Truth or dare?!"

"Umm, truth." said Samus.

"Yep, I knew you where a pussy." said Snake.

"Fine, dare me!" she said crossing her arms and legs.

"Cool!" he said. "I dare you to kiss Sango."

Samus raised an eye brow and looked at Sango.

"Do it! Do it! Do it! Do it!" chanted all of the boys, well, except for Cloud, Snake, and Shadow.

"All right, all right…" said Samus, "Just shut up."

Sango and Samus faced each other and started up a long kiss. Everyone cheered again and Dante took another picture with his phone. They stopped after 10 seconds.

"Ten good seconds of lesbian action!" said Kadaj. "Alright!"

"What is up with you guys and lesbians?" asked Sango.

Samus spun the bottle and after 4 seconds, it landed on Flamdramon. He gulped. "Truth or dare?"

"………truth…" he said.

"Okay, is it true that you can be deleted if you come in contact with a magnet?" asked Samus.

"Apparently, no." he said. "I may be a digital monster, but outside my world I'm as real as any of you people." Flamdramon spun the bottle again and it spun to Snake. "Solid Snake, truth or dare?"

"Truth." He said. "I have my pride and I don't want to be disgraced by some perverted dare."

"Fine, is it true that you put on this tough-guy-gun-wielding-high-ranking-soldier attitude to cover up for something?" he asked.

Snake laughed at his question. "Fool! I have nothing to hide." he said with confidence. "So the answer is no!" He kicked the bottle and it started to spin. It landed on Cloud. "Well, well, well…"

"Crap…" said Cloud.

"Truth or Dare?" he said pulling out his magnum. "And it better be dare."

"Fine dare." He said. "Just don't point that at me."

"I command you to shave off all of your hair." he said.

Everyone looked at Cloud and imagined what he'd look like without his hair.

Cloud thought about it for a minute. More like 5, no 12. "I'll pass."

"Fine." said Snake as he spun the bottle again. It landed on Kadaj. "Truth or dare, weirdo."

"I'll do dare." said Kadaj.

"I dare you to kick Shadow in the face." said Snake.

Kadaj sat up and looked to Shadow. "Okay."

Shadow backed away. "Touch me and I'll put seventeen holes in your lungs!"

"Not without this." said Kamille holding Shadow's gun in his hand.

"My gun!" said Shadow.

"I got practice from soccer!" Kadaj walked up and kicked him in the face which sent him into the wall. "He's lighter than he looks."

"Or you're stronger than you look." said Tails.

"Is it my turn now?" he asked.

"Yes." said Roxas.

Kadaj spun the bottle and it spun for a few seconds before landing on Davis. "Truth or dare?"

"Dare me." he said smiling.

"I dare you to take my sword," he said pulling it out from its sheath. "And run it through your heart."

"You're crazy, Kadaj!" said Sango.

"That'll kill him!" said Alia.

"Okay!" said Davis. He grabbed Kadaj's sword and stabbed himself into his chest all the way to the hilt. Blood sprayed out of him as the blade came out his back. "See? Nothing to it."

Kadaj looked at his injury. "…Steve, are you okay…?"

"Sure."

"Um, okay…it's your turn now…" he said.

"Cool." said Davis. He reached over and spun the bottle. It landed on Sango. "Truth or dare."

"Umm…dare." she said.

"Cool, I dare you to take off your kimono!" he said.

"We get to see Sango naked?" asked Loz. "Sweet!"

"Okay." said Sango with a smile.

"Holy shit, really?" said Davis.

"Sure." She said untying the fabric around her waist that held it closed. Then she removed the green cloth in front of it.

"This will be great!" said Kamille.

Then she took her whole kimono off to reveal a black full body outfit with pink armor. "Done."

"…you had that on the whole time…?" asked Dante.

"Sure." she said. "Is it my turn now?"

"Steve, you wasted your turn." said Kamille.

Sango spun the bottle and it landed on Roxas. "Okay, Roxas."

"Oh, crap…" he said.

"Truth or dare."

"Umm, dare." he said sweating a little. "What's the worst you could make me do?"

"Corn-hole Flamdramon." said Yazoo. Roxas gulped.

"I dare you to sing Jesse McCartney's Beautiful Soul." said Sango.

Dante spat out his beer.

"What?!" said Roxas. "Why do you want me to do that?!"

"Because your American voice actor for Kingdom Hearts II was Jesse McCartney." said Yuffie. "C'mon, do it!"

"No, please!" said Roxas. "I skip!"

"Okay." said Sango spinning again. It pointed to the wall. "Huh?"

Kadaj walked over to the window and looked out it. "The bottle is pointing to the Zeta Gundam."

"But the Zeta Gundam can't do anything unless Kamille's in it other than sit in the drive way." said Tails.

"Then let me spin again." Sango grabbed the bottle and spun it. It landed on a livelier person: Yazoo. "Yazoo, truth or dare."

"Umm, I quit."

"Huh?" said Kadaj.

"I don't want to be dared to do something crazy, stupid, perverted, homosexual, or suicidal." He said. "I'm going to drive out to the mall." he got up from his chair and walked to the garage.

"I'm coming too!" said Loz following him.

"Shotgun!" said Kadaj running after them after pulling his sword out of Steve's chest.

Everyone looked at each other as the brothers left. "Actually, the mall seems like a good idea." said Roxas.

TO BE CONTINUED…

NEXT: DAY FOUR: DON'T MESS WITH VOODOO


	5. Day 4: Don't mess with VooDoo

DAY FOUR: DON'T MESS WITH VOODOO

(Still don't own anyone except Ahmed, who works at a Seven Eleven)

Kadaj, Yazoo, Loz, Dante, and Kamille drove out to get some fresh air and spend some time screwing around. Dante drove them around with Kamille sitting shotgun and the three brothers sitting in back. "Shopping at the mall was great." said Loz.

"Yeah, so many nice girls." said Yazoo.

"I need to get some grub, guys." said Dante.

"Then let's stop some where." said Kamille.

Kadaj looked out the window. "Hey look guys, Ahmed's Seven Eleven!"

"Say what?" said Dante.

"Got to the Seven Eleven, we know someone there!" said Yazoo.

Dante pulled up to the Seven Eleven and parked in the parking lot. "Why are we here?"

"For grub." said Loz. Dante and the others headed into the store and Kadaj walked up to the desk.

"Hey, Ahmed!"

The door to the storage room came open and a man with very dark skin peaked out. "Oh, it's you!" said the man in a strong Middle Eastern accent. "Welcome back, my friend!"

"Hi, Ahmed!" said Yazoo.

"Who's this guy?" asked Dante.

"He works here." said Loz.

Dante and Kamille walk up to the desk. "Oh, who are these two?"

"These are Dante and Kamille." said Loz. "Our friends."

"Hi, Ahmed, how's the opium dealing going?" asked Dante.

Everyone fell silent.

"Blown up any buildings lately?" asked Kamille. Both of them laughed like crazy.

Kadaj, Yazoo, and Loz dropped their jaws. Kadaj looked to Ahmed. "Th-they didn't really mean that…"

"Hey, how many of your friends blew themselves up?" asked Dante still laughing.

"C'mon guys, that's enough!" said Yazoo.

"What? Rag-head jokes are funny." said Kamille.

"Rag-head?!" said Ahmed.

"He didn't mean that either!" said Kadaj.

"You dare insult my culture?!" said Ahmed.

"What are you going to do? Call the Al-Queda on us?" said Dante laughing.

Loz grabbed his head and gripped his teeth.

"That is it!" Ahmed started drawing some weird symbol on the table of the store and started chanting something. Then he reached under the desk and pulled out a live chicken and a cleaver. He placed the chicken's head on the table and chopped it off with the cleaver. "Done."

"What the fuck was that?" said Kamille.

"I have cursed you!" he said. "The next day, your actions match your age."

"Oooo, a scary curse!" said Dante.

"Guys, before you make any more jokes to make this any worse, I suggest we just buy something and leave." said Kadaj. "I'm so sorry, Ahmed."

"Why should you apologize?" he said. "Those two dip-shits should be the ones apologizing!"

"I'll buy something, how about some weapons of mass destruction?" said Dante.

"In the name of Allah…GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY STORE!"

**At the house…**

"Home at last." said Kamille after getting home with the others at 10:46 in the afternoon.

"I can't believe you did that to Ahmed!" said Kadaj.

"Hey, it was funny." He said going to his room. "I'm hitting the sack."

"He put a curse on you!" said Kadaj.

"If Dante doesn't have to worry about it, then neither do I."

Kadaj sighed as Kamille closed the door and Samus walked over to him after hearing the yelling. "He's going to get it now…"

"Get what?" asked Samus holding a basket of laundry.

"Ahmed from the Seven Eleven put a curse on him." said Kadaj.

"Well for all I know, there's no such thing as a curse." said Samus.

"Then you're about to change your mind." said Yazoo.

DAY FOUR: DON'T MESS WITH VOODOO PT. 2

Everyone was sitting down at the breakfast table after making their own breakfast since Dante wasn't up to make it. He was the house cook. "Where's Dante?" asked Yuffie.

"Where's Kamille?" asked Roxas.

"I think they're sleeping in." said Sango.

"Dante never sleeps in." said Flamdramon. "We always wake up early to make breakfast."

"Well, he could be hung over." said Cloud.

"Or…it's the curse…" said Loz.

"Bull shit, I've traveled from one galaxy to the next and I've learned that there's no such thing as a curse." said Samus.

"Damn, I just fell down the stairs today." Everyone turned to the door; they expected to see Kamille since they heard his voice, but no one was there, then they looked down to see an unbelievable sight. "Hey, how did you all get so damn big?" Kamille was almost the same size of Tails.

Everyone dropped their jaws. "Holy…crap…" said Samus.

"Told ya." said Yazoo.

"Kamille…?" said Alia.

"What?" he said. He looked down at himself. "OMIGOD!!"

"He's a kid!" said Yuffie.

"I don't believe it." said Cloud.

Snake stared. "…"

"Holy shit!" said Kamille. "That guy did curse me!"

"If you're a kid…then Dante…"

"Dante's like a thousand years old, if the curse only knocked off twelve years of Kamille's life, then Dante shouldn't be easily affected." said Sango.

Dante bursted in through the door. "Okay Flamdramon, let's get cracken'!" He looked to his left. "Hey, Kamille." Then he noticed that he was looking at Kamille without looking down. "Hey, how did you get so damn big?" Then he looked at everyone else that gathered around them. "Hey, how did you all get so damn big?"

"Dante, you have been cursed!" said Flamdramon.

"Oh, the guy from the Seven Eleven, right?" he said.

"Okay, I believe in curses." said Samus.

"You guys shouldn't have made those jokes." said Kadaj.

"Hey, I couldn't help myself." said Dante.

"Neither can you help yourself now." said Loz.

"Okay we get it, we screwed up!" said Kamille. "Now what do we do?!"

"You can apologize to him." said Yazoo.

"Apologize!?" said Dante. "The guy used voodoo on us!"

"He's from Iraq, not India." said Yazoo.

"Hey Samus, you go to this Ahmed and fine a way to reverse the curse." said Cloud.

"What?" said Samus. "I don't know the first thing about curses, I didn't believe in them up until now!"

"Now you can learn." said Kadaj. "I'm sure Ahmed will help someone like you."

"Fine, but you guys will have to do something with those two." said Samus walking out of the room.

Dante and Kamille looked at the others. "…this sucks…" said Kamille.

"My brother will kill me if he saw me right now." said Dante. "Actually, he'll kill me when ever he sees me any day of the week."

**The Seven Eleven…**

Samus drove out to the Seven Eleven where Ahmed worked. "This must be the place." She parked and walked in. "I can't believe I have to get involved in this…"

Samus entered and Ahmed watched her enter. "Oh, welcome to my store, how may I help you?"

Samus walked up to the front desk and sat her arms down on it. "I'm Samus Aran; I'm here regarding the fact that you put a curse on two idiots that live with me."

"You are related to those pricks?" asked Ahmed.

"What? No I'm not related, I'm part of the reality TV show called Draw Together." she said. "I was picked with those guys."

"Sounds like it sucks to be with them." said Ahmed.

"Just tell me how to reverse the curse." she said.

"For a price." said Ahmed.

Samus sighed. "What do you want?" she asked.

"$25." he said.

"Okay."

"In Cornarian credits."

"…excuse me?" she asked.

"You must get me 25 Cornarian credits from the planet Cornaria in 24 hours." he said. "I have a money collection and I need Cornarian credits to help me get closer to completing it."

"I can't go to another planet right now, I just dropped my ship off at the repair shop." said Samus.

"Then no cure."

"Fine, I'll just fine my own transportation." said Samus walking out of the store.

Ahmed watched her walk out and get into her car. "That's a fine white woman."

**At the house…**

Dante jumped up and down trying to get the TV remote off the top of the TV screen. "Dammit, I can't reach!"

"Just use the buttons at the bottom of the screen, Dante." said Kamille sitting on the couch.

"Then I'd have to get up and change the channel every time!" said Dante.

"Well its good exercise." said Kamille. He heard the door open and Samus stomped in saying: fuck, shit, and god dammit. She walked into the kitchen and back into the family room and sat down with a Coke in her hands.

"Do you have the cure?!" said Dante.

"No…Ahmed wants me to travel to a planet at the most inconvenient time to get him 25 Cornarian Credits." she said lying back on the couch. "I don't have a ship to use!"

"Aww, Jesus!" said Dante.

"…I do…" said Kamille.

Samus shot up. "You have a ship?"

"It's not mine, but I'm sure you can use it." said Kamille. "It's the Argama; it should be near Earth by now, plus Cornaria isn't too far away."

"How can I contact it?!" asked Samus.

"The Zeta Gundam's long range communication system." he said.

"Teach me how to use it!" she said grabbing Kamille and running outside.

"Hey wait Samus, can you get the remote…" said Dante before the door closed. "…shit…"

Samus jumped up to the cockpit hatch on the Zeta Gundam and got it open. She jumped inside and sat in the pilot chair. Samus looked around at the inside with confusion at the technology. "How the hell does this thing work? It's like a large ball."

"You get use to it after a while when you learn to pilot this thing." said Kamille sitting on her lap and pressing buttons on the main controls. "Come in, Argama! Come in, Argama!"

"Argama here, this is Lieutenant Quattro speaking."

"This is Kamille Bidan, I need you to get to Earth to pick me up." said Kamille.

"Rodger, well be there in ten hours, over and out."

"Ten Hours!?" said Kamille after the connection closed. "The Zeta Gundam can go from here to Cornaria and back within that time!!" Then a though went through Kamille's mind. He turned to Samus. "Samus, you're a pilot right? Take the Zeta Gundam and go to Cornaria!"

"Me fly this thing?" asked Samus.

"Sure!" said Kamille reaching under the seat and pulling out the manual. "It's easy, it takes 25 minutes to learn, plus the controls are all labeled! You want me to return to normal don't you?"

Samus sighed. "…fine." she grabbed the manual. Then she took Kamille back into the house. Samus jumped back into the cockpit and opened the manual. "I just need to know how to fly this thing to one planet and back…"

Kamille sat on the couch and saw Dante with the remote. "You got it down?"

"Nope, Flamdramon did." he said.

Samus looked through the final pages of the manual and put it under the seat. "Okay, this is going to take a lot out of my day, but gets a problem out of the way." Samus started pressing buttons and the sounds of the machine's engine starting up were heard. Then the ball-like cockpit lit up for a full 360 degree view of everything outside of the machine. "I need to get back to being a bounty hunter…" The Zeta Gundam lifted off the ground and transformed into its wave-rider form and lifted off into the sky.

Yuffie watched the large machine lift off. "…Kamille can still use that thing?"

Kamille and Dante sat on the couch watching TV. "So, all's we have to do is sit here and wait for Samus to come back with the way to cure us."

"…what day is it today?" asked Dante.

"Tuesday." said Kamille.

"The what of October?" asked Dante.

"The 16th." said Kamille.

"…my brother's coming here…" said Dante.

Kamille spat out his drink. "Now?!"

"If he sees me like this, he'll leave this house with all of the bones in my body broken!" said Dante. "I need to hide!"

Half way between Earth and Cornaria, Samus checked the map on the forward monitors. "Should be there in a few hours." Then something started beeping. Samus checked the other monitors and saw something approaching her from behind. "Aww, come on!"

"Look a stray mobile suit! Let's try to shoot it down because we're expendable villains that only appear once in this story!" said one of the pursuers.

"Crap, do I have any weapons?" Samus looked into the weapons list on the computer and: Beam Rifle fell under main weapons. "Where's the beam rifle?"

**On Earth…**

"Look at the size of this gun on the lawn!" said Loz trying to pick it up with Yazoo and Kadaj. "Let's see if it fits in the shed."

**In Space…**

"Damn…" Then several shot came at her from the enemy mobile suits and she moved away from them. "Is this Ahmed's idea?!"

"Why are we such terrible shots!?" said one of them.

Samus quickly transformed the Zeta and kicked one of them in the head, removing it from the rest of the body. Then she folded the legs back up and made a successful spring kick to the body of the machine.

"What the fuck?!" said one of them before getting hit by the Zeta's grenade launcher causing him to explode.

"Sonova…are we that expendable?!" said the undamaged one. Samus found him and flew at him. Then another one came between her and her target. She flew the Zeta on top of the obstacle and used him as a springboard and caused serious damage to his machine before ramming the shield into the cockpit of the last one. Then she transformed and flew back on course. "Holy shit, we just got PWND!"

Samus looked back at the damage she did. "Why didn't I have one of these when I started my career as a bounty hunter?"

**Earth…**

"Quick, let's hide in the shed!" said Kamille running to the shed with Dante. Kamille looked up and saw that the shed's lock was beyond their reach. "Crap!" He looked up and saw something sticking out of the roof of it. "Is that the beam rifle?!"

"Let's hide in the booze cellar!" said Dante as they ran back into the house.

**Cornaria…**

Samus landed the Zeta Gundam on the ground and jumped out. Then she ran into the city. "I can just ask almost anyone here for the money, but I think I know someone here that I can get money from." Samus looked around, and found the person she was looking for. "Fox! Hey, Fox!"

Fox McCloud spun around and saw Samus run up to him. "Samus?"

"Hey, Fox." said Samus.

"Hey, I haven't seen you since Super Smash Bros. Melee." said Fox. "Come to think of it, why did they call it Super Smash Bros. if some of the characters were female…?"

"Don't know, don't care at the moment." said Samus. "I just have 13 hours to get back to earth with $25 worth of your planet's money to change my friends back to normal from a curse!"

"Oh, um, okay." He said. Fox reached into his pocket and pulled out the money. "Here, oh and, remember, Super Smash Bros. Brawl is coming soon."

"Yeah, I know, bye!" she said running off to the Zeta Gundam and flying away.

"I didn't think our money was used on Earth…" said Fox.

**On Earth…**

Dante and Kamille look around for a place to hide before Judgment Day arrives for them. "We have to hide fast, or Virgil will hack me up into bacon strips!" said Dante. Suddenly a tremor was felt. "What was that?!"

"Felt like something hit the ground!" said Kamille.

"Or…it's the paper boy." said Kadaj.

Kamille looked out the window. "Fuck, it's Lt. Quattro!" he said. "I forgot to call off the Argama's trip!"

"So he's someone you know that's here to kill you?" said Dante.

"He might!" said Kamille. "Quick, the coat closet!" Dante and Kamille opened the closet and ran in before closing it. "Kadaj, think of a diversion!"

"Okay." He said.

Lt. Quattro knocked. "Hello, this is Lt. Quattro, is Kamille here?"

Kadaj opened the door. "Can I help you?"

"Yes miss…"

"I'm a guy…" corrected Kadaj.

"Oh, sorry, umm, is Kamille here?" asked Quattro.

"Yep." he said inviting Quattro in. "I'll go get him."

"Please do." he said standing in the room.

**In space…**

Samus fell asleep for a while until the alarm went off. "Huh?!" she got up and looked forward. There was a whole fleet of three space ships and nine mobile suits in front of her. "Jesus Christ!"

"Look, it's the thing that killed our buddies, shot it!"

"Oh, so you all want some!?" said Samus, now had enough with everything getting in her way of surviving the day. "Bring it you Sons of bitches!!"

**The House…**

Quattro stood there for a bit until Veemon walked over to him. "…sup?"

Quattro looked over to him. "Oh, they have a lizard."

"Do I look like a lizard to you?" asked Veemon. Then someone knocked on the door. "I'll get it!" he digivolves into Flamdramon, which freaked Quattro out a first, and answers the door. "Hello?"

"Is Dante here?"

"Yep." said Flamdramon.

"Shit!" said Dante, listening through the door. "What now, Newtype?"

Kamille thought for a second and looked at the coat on the hanger. "Dante, get me on your shoulders."

Virgil walked in and looked around. "Where is Dante?"

"Let me go look for him." he said before walking off.

"Hmm, I wonder where Kamille is…" said Quattro.

"You here for someone too?" said Virgil.

"Yes."

Suddenly, on Dante's shoulders, Kamille walked out of the closet. "Hi, Lieutenant."

"Kamille?" said Quattro.

"So this Kamille is a guy?" said Virgil.

"Hi, um, how are you doing?" said Kamille, trying to keep his balance.

"I'm fine, now, what did you call us for?" asked Quattro.

"Oh, that…umm…" said Kamille trying to think of something.

"Where's Dante, little boy?" said Virgil.

"Umm, I'll go get him." He said. Dante turned around and walked into the other room. "Switch places!" he said.

Quattro folded his arms and tapped his foot. Dante came in on Kamille's shoulders. "Hey, bro!"

"It's that day, Dante." said Virgil grabbing his sword. "Time to die!"

"Hey, can't it wait?" said Dante trying to keep a straight face, knowing that Kamille was the one supporting him. "I'm having fun here."

"Fun's over!" said Virgil.

**The Seven Eleven…**

Ahmed put a case of Mountain Dew on the table and the tremor of something big hitting the ground made it fall over and some of them bursted open. "Stupid Americans have no respect!" Samus ran in. "Oh, right on time."

Samus grabbed his hand and threw the money in it. "There, now change my friends back!"

"Okay, okay…don't start attacking me with insults." He said walking over to his desk. "And I thought you weren't going to make it."

"I battled a fleet of robots just to get back here!" said Samus. "This cure better work!"

**The House…**

"See you in hell, Dante!" said Virgil.

"Hey Dante, where's Kamille?" said Kadaj. "And why are you wearing Roxas's coat?"

"Umm, it's comfy?" he said.

"Time to die!" Virgil stuck his sword into the coat where Dante's liver should be. The blade went right past Kamille's face and out the other side of the coat.

Quattro jumped back. "Holy…"

"Ohhhh, you got me!" said Dante even though Virgil missed. "I'm dying! I'm dying!"

"Die faster!" said Virgil stabbing into the coat more. "I feel like I'm stabbing an empty space in your stomach!"

"I am dying fast!" he said. All of the sudden, Virgil's sword was pulled out of his hand and the handle pointed upwards as Dante felt his body grow in size and push the sword blade down.

Kamille crawled out of under Dante and stood up, now at full size. "I'm back to normal!!"

Dante opened the coat and looked at himself. "So am I!"

"What the hell's going on here?" said Quattro.

"Long story." said Kamille. "Oh and, you can leave now, it was a miss call."

Quattro rolled his eyes behind his sunglasses and left the house. Another tremor was felt before Samus ran into the doorway to see the situation. "Good, it worked!" she said pushing Virgil to the side. "Thank god!" she said.

"Hey, who is this?" said Virgil.

"That's Samus, one of the hot girls here." said Dante.

"I'm now going to my room, so that none of you guys fine another reason for me to clean up your messes!" she said stomping up the stairs.

"…I think she's on her period…" said Kamille.

Virgil looked at Dante. "None of what just occurred right now changes the situation!" said Virgil picking up his sword. "You will die!"

Dante takes out a roll of paper. "Hey buddy, here's my will, can you sign it so you get all of my belongings?"

"Gladly!" Virgil put his finger onto the tip of his sword and cut it open. Then he used his blood to write his name down in cursive. "There, once you die, I get everything you own; including your job!"

Dante started laughing like crazy. So was Kamille. "He fell for it!!"

"What's so damn funny?!" said Virgil.

"You gullible bastard!" said Dante. "You didn't sign my will! You just signed the contract to be a member of the Drawn Together house hold!" he said laughing.

"What?!" said Virgil. "What have you done?!"

Kadaj walks over to him. "That means you can die as many times as you want and you will come back to life at the stroke of midnight as long as you live here with us."

Virgil glared at Kadaj. "Do I have to live with you…?" Kadaj nodded. "Well, at lease I can't die and I can kill Dante as much as I want!!" he said raising his sword. He looked to Kadaj. "Can I kill you people too?" Kadaj nodded. "Good!" Virgil turned to his left and saw Tails.

"Hi! I'm Tails." he said. "You want to be best friends with me?"

Virgil decapitated Tails after running his sword through his head. "This is brilliant! Now I can kill the same person off as many times as I wish!"

"Great." said Kamille. "Hey, Snake!" An object on the wall that couldn't be seen turned around to reveal that is was Solid Snake with the same paint as the wall painted on his back. "…how long have you been there?"

"Long enough, what do you want?" he said.

"Who's this weirdo?" said Virgil pointing to him.

"Virgil has become a family member, time for initiation!" said Dante.

"Initiation?" said Virgil. Snake came up behind him, grabbed his mouth, and drove his 16 inch hunting knife into Virgil's back. Then he pulled it out and did it again and again and again and again. Virgil kicked him off and pulled it out of his back. "How dare you defile my coat?!" He turned to Snake and threw his knife right into his chest. But Shake didn't move, he just stood there with his fists on his hips with a big smile on his face.

"What the heck?" said Dante.

Kadaj walked over to Snake and looked to his side. "It's a cardboard cut out of Snake."

"Damn, he's good." said Kamille.

"Well then where is the back stabber?!" said Virgil. "Come out Mr. Disappear!" Then the air vent cover came off and fell on the ground. "What the hell?!"

"Oh, he's in the air vent." said Kamille.

"You win this round, old man." said Virgil. "But as long as I'm here in this house, I shall kill you!"

NEW MEMBER STATS:

Virgil:

Game: Devil May Cry

Age: looks 24

Occupation: None

Description: Dante's demonic, power hungry, twin brother. Dante has already thwarted Virgil's plan to unleash all hell on the world and obtain their father's power. Even since then, Virgil was out for revenge. He came to Dante's house to kill him for what he did, but ended up being tricked into joining the people Dante lives with.

COMING SOON: DAY 6: THE HOLE IN THE BASEMENT


End file.
